Posted by: Craig | 2 July, 2007

Longing…..

Matt Chandlers latest sermon series has been talking about what is probably one of the biggest things I struggle with in my faith. Why do we not Love God as we should?

I have over the last 2 years struggled with thoughts such as is my faith real, do I know Christ, have I just somehow found enjoyment through living as a Christian, sometimes I even doubted those spiritual experiences with crazy psychological explanations. If I love God more than anything on this Earth should my thoughts and life not revolve around him, I mean when a guy even in the beginnings of liking a girl (way before it is love) he has her on his mind most of the time and a lot of his life will revolve around that girl. So I struggled with why if I love God as I should do I not act like I do.

I know that in the bible there are people that love him in such amazing ways, take Habbakuk who says take everything from me let my crops die and let me starve and I will rejoice in the Lord, how great a love is that it is without condition. The disciples that get beaten and go away singing for they suffered like Christ did. This is a love that is scary!

So a place I find my self more and more often these days is that of the psalmist that wrote psalm 42, “As the deer pants for the water” as the deer is famished and dying it longs for the water it needs the water it is not just panting because it wants a casual drink. Now before you say that if I find myself here more and more is a bad thing it is not as it is not that I find myself away from God more but that when I am distant from God rather than indifference I desire God to be back.

So love and longing for God seems to work out in my life like this now, there are points (which are increasing in frequency ) where my heart yearns for God where I know that my heart loves God above all else with out a doubt, where I am crying out to him more than ever before, but then between those points my desire and love of God can seem to vary and even seem non existent sometimes. So during these times I have to trust that I do love God above all from those moments I have to trust the promises of God in scripture so it is sometimes I do things in obedience trusting that I will draw close to God again.

I know I love God above all else and through my love for him each day I enjoy more and more the things in my life that glorify him.

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Responses

  1. wow Craig, it’s so rare and beautiful and precious to see such a desire for God and His glory. praise God for giving you a heart that can love Him like that! and you know the best thing of all is that even when we feel such an all-consuming love for God, it is only a faint echo of the incredible love He has for us!

  2. Agreed: great questions to ask yourself! In my view, the questions are themselves part of the longing – the longing to love God more. A lot of people, especially British men, have great difficulty identifying (or even experiencing) their feelings. It’s an excellent idea to ask for God’s help in this, and especially to help me to love Him more deeply. Go for it!


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